Taking offense

Recently, I've realized that I've been offended by many borderline racist incidents. Not to say that I ever condoned such incidents in the past. I suppose I just haven't been affected, or really felt strongly enough to the point that I need to express my disapproval. The point of realization came when an individual sent out a link to our club's listserv, which is clearly an ignorant non-Asian trying to poke fun at the Asian accent, which got me all riled up and upset for several reasons. First of all, seldom do you hear people making fun of European accents-if anything, there are jokes about Italian accents. But that still doesn't make it okay. The video is also an unfortunate reflection on the ignorance of some people of the West (with regard to the East). The accent is very non-representative of any East Asian language. I've been told that it is trying to imitate Cantonese...though even that is really far-fetched. I don't think it's cute, or hilarious. It's obnoxious. I always believed that, not to make a huge generalization or stereotype and be hypocritical, in their interactions with non-Asians, Asians usually keep to themselves. Therefore, why are we singled out and portrayed so negatively? But I don't seem to be offended by comedians such as Russel Peters. Then again, he is surely not as..for lack of better terminology, ignorant as the caller in the link.

I was thinking about this as I was driving last night, which really sent my mood over the edge. I realized that it was strange that I was this upset over the link-it's not like I haven't been exposed to such things before, so why now? Conclusion: during my high school years, I had become jaded to it, and was even singled out by my friends (who weren't even random white people...but actually the most diverse people of my grade) as that "over-achieving Asian". The way that I coped with this was by laughing along, brushing such labels as "just another stereotype". But having come to Barnard/Columbia, as my sister likes to tell people, I really jumped into the Asian circle. And though I'm mostly active in the cultural clubs, I've been made more aware of certain issues, such as Asian American identity, and what it means to be Asian. And it most certainly doesn't entail anything like that link implies. Also, I started this blog partly in attempt to express myself better and more (part of my efforts to be less passive-aggressive), clearly something I'm still working on.

This post in a nutshell? I take offense to the ignorant attempts at jokes.

So long, farewell!

The best of 2009:

1. 10/30-10/31
2. LG 2009: CAN'T STOP WON'T STOP
   
3. Willy's Birthday Club (aka OCAC)
4. Jumpstart
5. Glee

Hopes for 2010:

1. Make less judgments about people (spending less time on facebook goes hand in hand with this)
2. Be more enlightened about the world around me (past, present, future)
3. Be more assertive/vocal about my opinions
4. Maintain organization at least once a week
5. Take more pictures
6. Be smarter about money
7. Spending more time with friends
8. Meeting new people
   

To be cont'd...

Oh the suburbs.

I miss the suburbs so much. Not only because that's still what I consider my real home, but there are little things about them that make me appreciate them so much more. For one, you're in YOUR home. It's a place to where you can escape to (was that even grammatically correct?), and no one can interfere with that. Also, you're spared the ruckus and what not from other people, which would be such a breath of fresh air, particularly during this time of the year.

Also, due to my laziness, I'm sure that I would save a good amount of money. The circulars at Morton Williams definitely have dented my wallet this semester, though it's also helped me learn about prices and I've become a better judge of whether or not something is cheap. However, its convenience has also put me at a disadvantage, since if I need a distraction/break, I just stroll outside and browse the circulars, or just see what "today's special" is. My dislike for driving surely would prevent me from making frequent visits to the local supermarket. Sad.

I think I also associate the suburbs with good memories-I don't remember being as stressed as I am now, I used to feel so accomplished...I know they say that when you come to college you're like a small fish in a huge pond, but I'm not even striving to excel in anything anymore-I just wish I were even still doing the things I used to claim to love. I don't even know what I'm doing with my life anymore...

Highlight of my day

There's an old man who lives on my floor in 600 who has the sweetest nurse, and this man is the most ridiculous individual, notorious for saying the most outrageous things ranging from "You're prettier than this elevator!" to "You penis!" (directed at his nurse). I had the great pleasure of waiting for the elevator with him today. As I was trying to avoid eye contact (as to avoid starting the day off on the wrong foot), but he started making these grand gestures that caught my attention. When he suddenly exclaimed, "Broadway dancer?!" Haha. I shook my head and said, "Mmm, no. Sorry." To which he replied, "Oh. Well, you're pretty anyway!" I think maybe he's just lonely and misunderstood.

My favorite time of the year!

1. Cooking up a storm in the kitchen with my sister (which 99% of the time is the equivalent of a really serious singing and dancing session)
2. Being home with my family, seeing old friends
3. Catching up on sleep, lounging around on the couch
4. Putting up the Christmas tree!
5. The prospect of snow coming down any day now
6. Christmas cheer
   
7. No real-life drama, only Japanese/Taiwanese dramas teehee
8. My own bed, kitchen, and bathroom
9. Christmas music!
   
10. Fall foliage

This year's Thanksgiving was quite a great success! Even though we feared that our house would explode aftercramming 40+ people into our house, it actually worked out rather nicely, since we opened up the porch and opened the window between the porch and the living room (whoaa I basically have no recollection of that ever happening), and naturally the kids gravitated into the family room whereas the adults were dispersed among the porch and living room. Like every year, my sister and I ran the danger of not having the food done by the time the guests arrived (since she always has an insane number of dishes to make), but I found out how ridiculously efficient I can be, which is surprising seeing how I was running on practically no sleep (by my standards). Though I was initially heartbroken at the absence of green bean casserole and sweet potato yams (my signature dishes), I as comforted by the adventure of trying out new dishes. Having been designated to cook 7 dishes, I was like "How the heck am I going to finish all of these?!" But it all worked out, and I even found time to wash dishes in between (which, as anyone that's ever cooked with me can attest to, it's like WOW).

However, with inexperience comes a lot more room for failure, and though everything I made was edible, there was definitely room for improvement. My yam biscuits were pretty good, though when you first bite into them, the yam flavor is very faint....next time I can probably use more than a cup of yam. The orange-scented string beans with almonds were a littttle undercooked, but I blame that on Anita, who said that they were fine. The wild mushrooms and spinach had a little too much dried sherry for my taste, and somehow had ended up on the dessert table and discovered only after everyone had stuffed themselves silly. But our guest this morning enjoyed it and even got second helpings, so I guess it wasn't awful. The heirloom potatoes with pecans and arugula were pretty good in my opinion, but wasn't as popular as I had thought. Maybe people didn't realize that the purple things were potatoes? But it means more for me! Yummy =). The apple sausage stuffing was not really stuffing, but still pretty delicious nonetheless. Definitely ate a lot of that before the guests came. The cranberry-apple chutney was alright, a little heavy on the cranberry, or it would've been better if it was paired with something (maybe I can add it to cous cous, which I now know how to make?). The cranberry sauce was pretty good, but it's hard to go wrong with that. The pasta with potatoes weren't bad, though I felt that the pasta part itself was a little dry, and since I've never made pasta without tomato sauce, it was a good learning experience for me.

Though I was admittedly a tad reluctant to test out new dishes, it probably made me a better chef overall...so thanks Anita! =D

A world without the Crazy Sexy Coolkids

Yesterday was the formal initiation for the OCMs of CSC-the famous board lock-in, which takes place from 11 PM - 6 AM.. definitely way past my bedtime (which, just for the record, is now 12 PM). As I was watching the kids playing and mingling, a wave of nostalgia suddenly hit me-it seems like it was just yesterday that I was the one trying to think of "the craziest thing that we could dare Allan (our president) to do," but realizing time and time again that they were actually really lame ideas (in the end, though spandex, tennis skirt, and tennis racket and Butler library were involved, it wasn't anything too crazy). The way they whispered in hushed tones (so that Annie wouldn't hear) made me want to be one of them. Not to say that the old board didn't have our share of fun (inculding massage trains, ECM karaoke time)...but it just wasn't the same, especially since only 3/10 of our OCM class remain on the board. There was even a point during the night when Annie, Lucas and I were sitting together, and kept reminiscing on our glory days, and realizing that this was our last board lock-in ever...gosh it seems so crazy. Growing up is indeed a bittersweet time. Does it get any easier as you get older, and the changes aren't so drastic? Do you become jaded by change? As far as I'm concerned, change is a scary thing that makes me (though I'm sure I'm not alone in the world) really on edge (note an earlier post).

On another note, the great success of board bondings and cooking for the past two days have inspired me to cook more and better stuff!

New recipe of the night: http://www.mykitchensnippets.com/2009/08/spinach-artichoke-dip.html. Apparently quite delicious when combined with guacamole!

Getting crazyyyy

I've been back on campus for only a month now, but so much as happened already. Aside from the chaos of classes, there's the stress that comes with being involved with campus organizations. Though I feel as though it's not more than I have been able to handle in the past, at times I feel completely overwhelmed, and it even got to the point of me breaking down, which is silly, seeing how there's only a 5% chance that I will remember it within the next 4 hours.

Between deliberations x2 and a new set of classes (no psychology classes-why?!), I find myself with no time to enjoy myself. I remember the days that I could just chill on the steps and chat with people. I suppose the fact that there are less and less people that I could do that with, along with the fact that I find myself constantly running around, or doing work plays a part...but I was definitely more involved in more things last year, so I'm confused as to why I feel like I have no time to enjoy myself...Am I just failing at time management this year? I guess the whole reading and interpreting and writing about it in classes kind of threw me off...and I'm still not completely acclimated to it, and seeing myself struggle really upsets me. And the whole tension in the room during deliberations just messes with my overall mood and motivation as well, and I just want to scream into the Tarako mountains.

I think I just need to do some soul searching now...I don't think it's a matter of prioritizing better-I think I'm set in that aspect...or am I? I don't even know anymore. Stress x a gazillion!